— Shared 3 weeks ago - 19,669 notes - via / Source - reblog

candlelion:

i talk a lot of shit for a legal adult who listens to one direction


— Shared 1 month ago - 167,457 notes - via / Source - reblog

mydogsnokes:

There are some automatic toilets that need 2 chill the fuck out


— Shared 1 month ago - 68,529 notes - via / Source - reblog

— Shared 2 months ago - 234,178 notes - via / Source - reblog

dandylyingwishes:

I love people who make me forget that I’m shy


— Shared 2 months ago - 476,437 notes - via / Source - reblog
  • Teacher: "Can you please tell the class why you're so late?"
  • Me: Someone told me to go to hell
  • Me: Couldn't find it at first
  • Me: But now I'm here

— Shared 2 months ago - 169,152 notes - via / Source - reblog

condom:

pissing people off should be a sport


— Shared 2 months ago - 412,476 notes - via / Source - reblog

New favourite joke:

where-am-i-send-help:

ougbad:

karlimeaghan:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five beers, please.”

i dont get it

No one explain it


— Shared 2 months ago - 188,465 notes - via / Source - reblog

religiousmom:

tumblr friendships are hard to maintain like im sorry i know i havent talked to you in 5 months but you’re still super rad and i still consider us friends im just dumb


— Shared 2 months ago - 253,763 notes - via / Source - reblog

nyankee:

aristi-cthonia:

awfulbanter:

Opinions are like orgasms, most girls aren’t taught that it is okay to have their own and are only expected to further men’s.

Holy shit.

woah there


— Shared 2 months ago - 328,133 notes - via / Source - reblog

castielandhishunters:

calumon:

my school’s “rival school” is on lockdown right now bc someone put weed in the vents so everyones slowly getting high oh my godd

I guess now you could call it a high school